


oh, i'm ready for it (come and bring it)

by montecarlos



Category: Formula E RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Mile High Club, Porn With Plot, Smut, Snakes, Snakes on a Plane AU, Spies & Secret Agents, Witness Protection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:23:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21922735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/montecarlos/pseuds/montecarlos
Summary: Daniel watches him take over, still trying to pull up his jeans and ignore the sticky sensation that coats the inside of his boxer shorts, his lip caught between his teeth - “so there’s literally snakes on this plane?”“Yes,” Lucas says gravely, but there’s the ghost of a smirk on his face. “But don’t worry, once I get you off here, we’re going to continue where we left off,”
Relationships: Daniel Abt/Lucas di Grassi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15
Collections: Motorsport Secret Santa 2019





	oh, i'm ready for it (come and bring it)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [econator](https://archiveofourown.org/users/econator/gifts).

> So this was for econator's prompt of gay wildlife on a plane. i don't think this is *exactly* what you were after but I took the idea of the Snakes on a Plane film and ran with it - it's a bit plotty and a bit porny. It's been a while since I wrote some FE fic and it seemed the perfect opportunity to revisit Daniel and Lucas, whilst making Lucas an agent and Daniel the resident fuckboi dumbass. Title is from the Cobra Starship song of the title track of SoaP. I hope you enjoy this!

_ “You will regret ever turning your back on your own family, Alejandro,” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ Alejandro laughed between blood-spatted lips. “I’d rather be dead than chained to you and your pathetic family of liars for any longer,” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ A gunshot then silence, as the body falls to the floor. Daniel had watched with baited breath as he watched the man’s dark eyes flicker into the shadows where he was standing. Daniel didn’t know the importance of what he had seen until he had watched the news the following day.  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ Crime Lord Alejandro Agag murdered in possible gang business.  _ _   
_ _   
_

* * *

_   
_ Daniel is snapped out of his thoughts as tall, dark and handsome slides into the seat next to him. He knows that he shouldn’t be checking out his fellow passengers, especially since he is on his way to stand as a witness in one of the most important criminal cases in recent history, but tall, dark and handsome is exactly Daniel’s type. However, it’s only when he looks a little more closely at the dark stubble and the sharp suit, that he recognises the man sitting next to him.    
  
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Daniel whispers under his breath as he finds himself staring into the dark brown eyes of his ex-lover.   
  
Agent Lucas di Grassi looks the same as he did when Daniel had met him a few years ago, he was a little more wet behind the ears then, a little more junior - but he’s certainly grown up. Daniel’s eyes trace over the muscular chest, down the tight, neatly pressed trousers, only to find the telltale sign of a gun concealed beneath the thin material. He sighs heavily - he knew tall, dark and handsome was too good to be true.    
  
“Daniel,” Lucas’s voice is steady and calm, there’s no trace of panic or of any heightened emotion. “I’ll be accompanying you on the flight to Berlin today to ensure your own protection.”   
  
Daniel resists the urge to swear under his breath. He knew that Jean-Eric would ensure that his prized witness would arrive in Berlin in one piece - his entire case against Piquet is resting solely on Daniel’s eyewitness statements and cross-examination. He just wishes that his lawyer had sent someone that he has a clear history with and doesn’t want to shag in the tiny airplane bathroom ever again. He’s certain that Agent di Grassi -  _ Lucas _ \- will want to keep things strictly professional between the two of them.   
  
“So is it just the two of us or do you have company Lucas?” Daniel asks, watching the eyes flicker back up to meet his own.    
  
“Just the two of us,” Agent di Grassi says brusquely. “You are a major criminal case asset, but I think you can be handled by one agent,”   
  
Daniel really wants to say that he would  _ love _ Lucas to handle him, but he decides to remain quiet. He slumps back into his seat, and peers out of the window as the agent beside him buckles his seatbelt, checking that his weapon is secure as he takes one last look around their surroundings, scoping out everyone and anyone who looks even remotely suspicious.   
  
“So Lucas, how have you been?” Daniel decides to start with an innocent question and a wide smile. It’s worked in the past - he knows that he’s not the best flirt in the world, but his smile is usually enough. But Lucas doesn’t bite this time, much to his dismay.    
  
“Please call me Agent di Grassi when I’m working,” Lucas says between gritted teeth.    
  
“Didn’t know that you were into naming kinks, Lucas,” Daniel teases.    
  
“Daniel-”   
  
Daniel smirks. “You know I love it when you call me that. You know I can’t keep calling you agent, no matter how much you liked it last time,”   
  
Lucas opens his mouth and closes it again. “I’m here strictly for business purposes, Daniel. I’m here to ensure that you get to Berlin in one piece so you can testify. Nothing more,”   
  
“I don’t understand why someone would want to bother killing me,”   
  
Lucas can think of several reasons, but remains silent on the matter.   
  


* * *

  
They are completely unaware of the danger that lurks beneath their feet - all beady eyes, hooked tongues, shiny skin and razor sharp fangs - they move against one another, kept awake by the constant beeping of the timer on the side of the box. The screen eventually flickers down to 0.00 and the box is blown apart, allowing the creatures inside to make their way out of their prison -    
  
“Did you plant the box as I ordered?” Piquet’s voice is crisp and no-nonsense. “That plane has to come out of the sky or Abt dies, I don’t care how it happens, just make sure it is done,”    
  
“It is done. Don’t worry, before the day is out, you’ll be tasting freedom again,”   
  
Piquet glances over at the prison guard, before turning back to his associate with a wry smile. “That’s what I like to hear,”   
  


* * *

  
“So when did you start protecting people and all that?” Daniel asks as he glances over at the other man who has remained silent and stoic so far throughout the flight. It has been boring and mundane thus far, the cabin is all lit up as the sunshine outside slowly begins to disappear. Daniel knows that he’s annoying the agent - he can tell from the low sighs that dispel themselves from his lips and the subtle eye rolls that he thinks Daniel didn’t catch.    
  
“Why does it matter?” the agent says with a sigh. “There was an special agent school we all had to go to. Don’t worry, I’m well more than equipped to protect you,”   
  
“I’m just making friendly conversation,” Daniel says, holding his hands up as though in surrender. “Two hours is a long time,”   
  
“Clearly,” Lucas mutters under his breath and it’s evident that he wants nothing more than this conversation - and torture - to be over.    
  
“Look, man, I’m not enjoying this anymore than you are - but I’m not some stupid kid who can’t protect myself. I’m not here to be babysat by you, I can handle myself just fine,” Daniel snarls under his breath.   
  
“I highly doubt that,” The agent scoffs under his breath. “I am trained to protect and kill if necessary. There is little you could do to protect yourself against somebody who is wanting to kill you, and trust me - Piquet wants to kill you,”   
  
“Thanks for making me feel better,” Daniel teases with a quirked eyebrow. “Makes me feel amazing knowing that someone has a target on my back,”   
  
“Don’t worry. You’re completely safe here,” Lucas says as the lights begin to flicker in the cabin.    
  


* * *

  
Slimy, lithe bodies twist over one another in an attempt to wake from their slumbers more quickly, razor sharp fangs severing through electrical cables -   
  
The lights in the cabin above continue to flicker, the instruments in the pilot’s cockpit flash and beep more than usual, but none of this is noticed by the passengers still enclosed within the cabin, most of them asleep, but not Daniel and Lucas - they both sit in their row, dark eyes flickering to glance at the dimming lights, the agent pulling his gun more tightly against himself as Daniel looks on in confusion.    
  
“Some turbulence huh?” Daniel says, raising an eyebrow as he glances out of the window. His foot taps against the footrest for a moment, before it stills - he doesn’t notice the snake that had paused at the shuffling sound of his foot against the carpet before it moves on, nor of the snakes that have breached through the air vents, silently making their own way into the cabin -    
  
“Where do you think you’re going?” Lucas says sharply, as Daniel suddenly stands up, trying to push past the older agent.   
  
“I’m going to the bathroom,” Daniel says, as though Lucas is stupid. “I think I can manage to go there without you,”    
  
However, the agent simply follows Daniel towards the bathroom door, his hand still tightly clutched around his gun.    
  
“Seriously?” Daniel shakes his head. “You’re seriously going to follow me into the bathroom?”   
  
“I have to make sure you are protected,” Lucas replies as he checks around twice in the darkened alleyway before following the witness into the bathroom. Daniel merely sighs heavily as the door is closed behind the pair.

* * *

  
“You know if you wanted me in private, all you had to do was say so,” Daniel teases, his voice light and languid. “You’ve had it all before, so it makes sense that you want it all for yourself again-” He’s cut off as he suddenly feels his body slammed up against the wall of the bathroom. “I always knew you liked it rough-”   
  
“Enough,” Lucas snarls against his shoulder. “I’m so sick of your flirting, all you’ve done is make me horny for the past hour and a half,” Daniel can feel the agent’s gun pressing up against his lower back, his grip tight enough to bruise. “You need to stop,”   
  
“Why should I? It’s fun to mess around with you,”

  
“Because I’m supposed to be doing a job,” Lucas hisses. “If I don’t do it properly, you’re dead,”   
  
“I know it when you talk dirty to me,” Daniel whispers as he’s forced further against the wall. “I always loved it when you were rough,”

“Daniel, stop it,” Lucas snarls, his touch is hard enough to bruise. “You need to settle down and behave,”   
  
“Or you’ll do what?” Daniel twists around in the agent’s hold, his dark eyes locking on equally dark and angry ones. “What do you plan on doing to me?”   
  
Lucas silences him with his lips. Daniel responds with enthusiasm, his hands moving to fist into the neatly pressed folds of Lucas’s shirt, sighing against the older man’s mouth. Lucas wastes no time pinning Daniel’s body against the wall, his knee wedging itself in between thighs. The two men are so focused on one another that they don’t realise that the lights are flickering once more - or that there’s a silent predator hiding out in the toilet, coiled and ready to pounce -    
  
“God, I’ve missed you,” Daniel whispers under his breath.    
  
Lucas’ lips slowly pulls themselves away, only to dance over his jawline and trace down over his neck, his tongue slowly drinking in the taste of the sweat that forms against the younger man’s skin. Daniel arches into the touch, the only sound is that of their shallow breaths mingling as one together as his fingers move to slide beneath Lucas’ trousers. 

The agent gasps at the sensation, his mouth stilling on Daniel’s neck as the younger man’s hands slowly make their way over his pale golden skin, his thumb resting on the waistband of Lucas’ underwear. “Do it,” Lucas urges, his eyes darker than usual.   
  
“Thought you were on duty,” Daniel teases, but allows his fingers to dip lower, his other hand pulling the zipper down slowly. “You always were the professional,”   
  
“Well,” Lucas pants. “Couldn’t let you go to the bathroom all on your own now could I?”    
  
Daniel smirks, slowly pulling down Lucas’s trousers and underwear, his eyes taking in the sight of Lucas’s cock in the bathroom light. His holster remains around his waist and Daniel is too lazy to take it off. The light flickers again, but the two men barely realise, their focus on one another. A forked tongue darts out of a mouth every so often, beady eyes fixed on the movement, it surges forward silently, ready to strike -    
  
Lucas allows the younger man to silently palm his cock as he mouths against Daniel’s neck, his tongue marking out every inch of the pale skin. His own hands move to slowly tug on Daniel’s jeans, making them drop into a heap on the floor. The witness shivers at the change of temperature, his bare skin suddenly chilled by the cool air inside the cabin bathroom.    
  
“So what now?” Daniel asks, his gaze unwavering.    
  
Lucas leans in, coating two of his fingers in his own spit before he slides them both inside Daniel - it’s a sweet but hard stretch, but Daniel voices his approval with a guttural moan as the lights once again flicker off and then on again. “God, you feel so good,” Lucas whispers as Daniel lets out another groan, his mouth slightly parted, his pupils blown -    
  
The tongue of the snake darts out again, its eyes trained on the two men still up against gthe wall, eyes unblinking, coils moving forward -    
  
“As good as you remember?” Daniel mutters, as he reaches down to tug lazily at Lucas’s thickening cock, his fingers smearing the pre-come all over the extended length, making the agent bite down on his lip, his fingers still pressed deep inside Daniel. “God, fuck me already,”   
  
Lucas doesn’t need to be told twice. He removes his fingers which causes Daniel to gasp out at the sudden loss of being full, before he’s moving himself into position and thrusting up into the younger man. Lucas has missed this sensation, he realises, as Daniel falls apart against him, his mouth falling open as he fights the urge to scream out Lucas’s name and wake the entire plane. Lucas presses his body further and further against Daniel’s, quietly whispering his name in between his thrusts -    
  
The snake moves closer, still silent, the tongue pulsing in and out -    
  
“God, I’ve missed you,” Lucas murmurs as he thrusts, his sighs leaving through half-swollen lips. “I’ve missed the sounds that you always seem to make,”   
  
“Only for you,” Daniel whispers, which only serves to make Lucas push harder, his cock fitting perfectly inside Daniel, as one of his hands moves to slowly curl around Daniel’s weeping half-hard cock, making the younger man arch up in satisfaction, Lucas’s name once again tearing itself from his lips. “God, a little more-”   
  
Lucas smirks as his thumb slowly brushes over the slit of Daniel’s penis, every thrust bringing the younger man closer and closer to what he desires. The star witness of Jean-Eric Vergne’s case looks truly debauched against the bathroom wall, his hair falling free of the gel, his lips swollen by Lucas’ own. “I want you to say my name when you come, so everyone on this plane knows who did this to you,”   
  
Daniel can only gasp in response, his eyes falling shut as he feels his body slowly begin to give in - he shudders as the lights flicker again, this time for a little longer - “Oh god, Lucas,  _ please _ ,”   
  
Closer, nearer, silently, coiled and ready to strike-   
  
“Love it when you come apart in my arms,” Lucas replies with that cocky shit-eating grin plastered on his face. “Love it when you’re like this just for me,” He murmurs thickly against Daniel’s shoulder, pressing a gentle kiss to the freckled, pale skin as he thrusts upwards and from Daniel’s groan of pleasure, he knows that he’s hit the prostate.    
  
Daniel seems to fall apart in his arms, the younger man having to be held up by the agent passed with protecting him as the lights flicker again. However, Lucas’ thrusts still slightly and Daniel whimpers as his orgasm threatens to wash over him, the tell-tale warmth spreading over the apex of his thighs - “Lucas, I’m going to-” Daniel begins, but the words barely leave his mouth as he feels the orgasm wash over him. He feels himself sag against the wall, completely spent but as he opens his eyes, he realises that Lucas has all but stopped, the agent not paying him any attention.    
  
His dark eyes flicker over to the toilet bowl and Daniel is about to bitch out a storm when Lucas pulls his gun from the holster still resting against his naked hips, firing one shot. Daniel raises an eyebrow, moving his head ever so slightly to spot the dead snake now floating in the toilet bowl.    
  
“What the fuck-” Daniel begins as Lucas gently kisses his forehead before he reluctantly pulls out of him. “How did a snake get in here?”   
  
“No doubt an attempt to bring down the plane,” Lucas says sharply as he glances at the lights as they flicker once more. “And kill you,” He moves in an almost uniform way, putting up his trousers and belting them up over long muscular calves with ease as the cabin crew, who have inevitably been woken by the gun shot, begin to bang on the door. They are silenced by Lucas, who only has to show off his badge and send them scuttling away, before he insists he needs to speak to the pilot immediately.    
  
Daniel watches him take over, still trying to pull up his jeans and ignore the sticky sensation that coats the inside of his boxer shorts, his lip caught between his teeth - “so there’s literally snakes on this plane?”   
  
“Yes,” Lucas says gravely, but there’s the ghost of a smirk on his face. “But don’t worry, once I get you off here, we’re going to continue where we left off,”   
  
Daniel can’t stop the grin spreading across his face. 


End file.
